Show and Tell !

[laynie.livejournal.com]

Hey Puffs, Claws, and Snakes!

I want to take a minute and share the results of the Gryffindor January In-House Contest with you. They were effing *HILARIOUS*, so I thought the participants deserved a little more recognition...and you guys deserved some laughter.




So, this was a two part contest. (And to keep this relatively short, I didn't list all the entries. But there is at least one from each person.)

Part 1

Create a caption for this picture



1st Place: superstition

Goyle: The beauty! BLINDED by the hair that was once encased by plentiful hair gel. My affections for you are vast and immeasurable. Toast to ME! As you shall on the day on which we are to be wed.
Draco: Shut UP Goyle! My affections are for Viktor Krum's fuzzy hat, and for Viktor Krum's fuzzy hat alone! I raise my cheaply made dollar store Goblet of Fire in the hopes that I shall have a future with that hat.
Viktor: Perhaps if I refuse to look at them, they will not be able to see me.


2nd Place: mhookermyers

Draco thinking: "I wonder if he's noticed that we have changed his regular coffee for decaf."
Viktor thinking: "Damn, what is this crap!"


3rd Place: aurora_rose_fsu

Draco: I'd look hot in that hat. I clearly need one.


3rd Place: glamcabaret

A toast! To that bloody awful ferret you've got stuck on your head.




magelet

Draco Malfoy - natural copy cat and closet fanboy of Victor Krum.



kakusareta

Dude, that so wasn't pumpkin juice.



sparkling_mud

Title: Lucius Malfoy's ring of male prostitutes.
Draco: My Father's a ponce. Just throwing that out there incase you're interested.
Viktor: What is this ponce?
Draco: An English pimp.
Crabbe: It's good money.



jessmah

Hah! My drink isn't laced with poison like yours is, Krum. Cheers!



rustedxemotions

Date rape isn't very common around here - c'mon, it's just some pumpkin juice.



oh_no_bad_touch

"That's right Vicky, drink the love potion, and you will be mine," Draco muttered under his breath.



ararejul

Little does Krum know that Malfoy has finally mastered love potions.



hope99_31516

Draco: I am the master of all things! KRUM SITS WITH ME!



sarahdocbb

Draco to himself: I wonder if he suspects the Amortentia?
Krum to himself: Hmm, vis smells of ve Narvhale...*slurrrp*
Goyle 'thinking' to himself: I wonder if Draco knows about the love spell thingy?



Part 2


Come up with a sentence or two using these three pictures.



1st Place: superstition

After claiming to see the Grim in Harry's tea leaves 365 days in the past year (and making special trips to Number 4 Privet Drive to steal Aunt Petunia's favorite teacups), Professor Trelawney cast a spell on Harry so that he was constantly surrounded by a gray backdrop much like the ones found in Muggle school photographs as a constant reminder of how screwed Harry truly is.


2nd Place: mhookermyers
-Screwing with an underage boy is not my cup of tea.

3rd Place: glamcabaret
-How many times do I have to tell you, Harry has screwed Sirius. 13 times.



lovin_cali

Random Jealous Hogwarts Student 1: (whispering) I heard Harry is screwing dogs.



sarahdocbb

The day Trelawny told Harry she forsaw him shagging Sirius, was when he really began to trust her abilities.



sofiaagapao

"SCREW THE DAMN GRIM!," Harry roared at Professor Trelawney. "I already know I'm going to die - Voldemort has tried to kill me so many times already... please, all I've ever wanted is to make sweet love to you!"



curledfries

Dear Harry,

Stop being a nutcase, it looks more like a Dementor to me rather than a Grim.

No love until you're okay,
Me



batkisses

Professor Trelawney looked at the Grimm in Harry’s tea leaves and turned to him and said, “It looks like you’re screwed.”



magelet

No one could say Harry was screwing around during Divination when he really did meet the foretold Grim the next day.



french_ie

Divination sure screwed with Harry's head.



Hope you got a good laugh from these. I sure did!


Brooke / Gryffindor / Prefect